Transitioning to a POST-COVID Mindset Can Be Challenging
I received my second vaccine a month ago. In the months, weeks, and days leading up to this, I had a list of the places I was going to fly off to and all the things I was going to do the moment I was immunized. Sun, warmth, and beaches permeated my thoughts. I assumed transitioning from living with angst around my safety, back to my pre-COVID ways of being, would be as easy as a light switch turning on. Like so many I have spoken with, I found this move from self-protection to openness to be more challenging than imagined.
After my vaccine I was immediately less concerned that if I did contract COVID, it would knock me down. That part was easy. What I found so challenging was breaking the habits and ways of being created by forced isolation of the past year. Friends and colleagues were experiencing the same apprehension and challenges. Excitement about the possibility of moving forward was dampened by a languishing that kept me stuck in my protected way of being. There was an obvious chasm between where I wanted to be and where I actually was that required attention.
Transitioning Out of a COVID Mindset
Challenges transitioning out of a COVID mindset is a real thing. There is an uneasiness and an anxiety that many people are experiencing. Transitions are like that. If you stop and consider the times in your life when you had to make a major shift from one way of being or thinking into another, they are always challenging. From college to the real world, from childless to parenting, from living in one community to another, from working for one company to a different one, from a full house to an empty nest. While each of these offers excitement about new experiences, moving forward and growing, the process of gaining comfort with these changes is seldom immediate and almost never without a fair does of angst.
One big difference with this transition is there is no vast swath of society that has managed through this before. No shared wisdom, passed down through generations who we can call on for sage advice. It is not something discussed in the lexicon of aging as a process we could all anticipate experiencing in some way, at some point. The good news is there are many things that can help this process.
Name Your Emotion
I encourage my clients, first and foremost, to honor their need for time and space and to be where you are – in other words, cut yourself a break. This has been a long hard journey. Honor the challenges of the road we have all been on and realize that not everyone drives at the same speed. Your journey may take a little longer than someone else’s and that is perfectly fine. Life is not a race. The next thing that helps in dealing with any emotion is naming it. Once you can name something and acknowledge its presence, the less power it seems to have. For me, a recent article by Adam Grant on languishing was an “ahh ha” moment in this effort.
Once you have a name for something, be honest with yourself and others that this is your current way of feeling. This takes a bit of courage as you need to share your own vulnerability. I have always found that once I shared my challenges, others were more than willing to acknowledge their own similar journey. This shared experience immediately made my burden seem a little easier, a little less powerful, and provided a foundation of support for figuring out the next steps forward on the road to transition.
Reclaiming Life Post-COVID
Having shared my angst with my sister, and she in turn hers with me, we made a plan to take some deliberate steps forward. While we did not hop on a plane to the islands or engage in banter with groups of strangers in a crowded indoor public forum, we did enjoy the sights, sounds, and energy of a city coming back to life. Helped by the lure of spring flowers in the Boston Public Garden, I set out on a path towards reclaiming life post-COVID. Walking down Newbury Street I saw diners relaxing on the sidewalks and shoppers excited by the purchases they carried on their arms. While some shuttered stores and empty buildings were a stark reminder of the toll of the past year, the joy, energy, and hope in the air was far more powerful than the fear and anxiety of the past. I experienced a living, thriving example of the strength and power of the human spirit, to emerge and move forward.
Managing through transitions is not about if you will move forward – we always end up in a different place, time takes care of that one way or the other. It is more a question of what the process will be like, how long it will take, and the impact your transition process will have on your outcome. Developing an intentional foundation from which to launch is a great first step in consciously moving forward in a way that makes you comfortable and confident.
So, give yourself a break, name what you are feeling, share what you are feeling with others and find support to take a few steps forward on the road to something new. One small step that pushes you out of your comfort zone. From my experience, a stroll through Boston in the springtime, a great new pair of shoes purchased inside a store and a fabulous sandwich from a favorite restaurant, eaten outside while laughing with my sister, came pretty darn close to feeling like the real world.
Awakening Your Muscle Memory
While I have not yet booked that fight to a tropical paradise, I do have some great new clothes to take with me when I do. I have awakened a muscle memory of living in a world without constant fear of serious illness and reconnected with the energy gained from gathering - a small part of something larger happening around me. I am squarely on the road, in charge, and driving my own transition to a post-COVID mindset.
If you do not have the good fortune of a sister to ride along with you, find a friend, colleague or partner to join your journey. Share your emotions and experience with others and do one thing to help yourself move forward. Once launched along this intentional journey, angst will ease, and the accumulated experiences of the life you lived for so long, will continue to propel positive momentum.
Happy hump day! May the second half of your week be a downhill ride!
