FINDING SPACE BETWEEN STIMULUS AND REACTION IS WHERE YOU CAN CREATE CHANGE
Last week while attending a coaching webinar on the power of habits, I was reminded of this wonderful quote by Victor Frankl, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” Frankl was a Holocaust survivor. He was also a neurologist and psychiatrist who dedicated much of his life’s work to helping others find goodness and meaning from life. The implication of the quote is that people often react without thinking. We don’t often take the time and space to create our reactions. Rather, we allow the power of habit to drive us.
Although the context in which this quote was presented was in understanding how to support clients to effectively develop new, more effective habits, the quote resonated far beyond that for me. It struck me as a powerful process in considering our response to racial inequality and bias.
While calling racial bias “an extremely bad habit” fails to grasp the enormity of the problem – thinking about our reactions as habits can offer an opportunity for change. We all bring bias to something, someplace. To race, gender, national origin, sexual orientation, sexual identity. Many of us bring it far more often than we would want to admit.
The point of Frankl’s quote is we don’t have to accept our reflective reactions of bias. By first recognizing that our minds have the power of flexibility, we can create reminders to pause, create space and consider. We can sit in the middle and consider why we think as we do, why we react as we do and if that is who we really want to be. Sit between stimulation and reaction and then be purposeful and plan your response to others. Owning our own habits is the first step necessary to than consciously creating alternative actions. Before you can hire, promote, support, and defend you must unlearn your reflective habit.
The space in the middle is where all the magic sits. It is the the jelly in the donut, all the good stuff in a sandwich and for me, the cream of the Oreo. It is the place where great things can be discovered.
The entirety of Frankl’s quote should be all you need to motivate you to pause, find space and consider how you want to respond. ”Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” – Victor Frankl
